Blur

Everyone told me that adding a second child to my life would be more difficult than when I had one.  I didn't realize just how different my life would be until it happened.  It is exhausting!  It is exhausting to have a newborn, but add a very energetic toddler to the mix and I am out of energy by noon.  I am doing my best to rest when I can.  I feel like the days go by so quickly I can't really enjoy them.  Meeghan is a pretty good baby.  She has had some fussy moments lately, but overall she has been great.  Hannah is showing some signs of jealousy, and she is definitely clingy.  She wants me to put the baby down and play with her every waking moment.  I do what I can to play with her, but I still have household work to do.  Basically, I never really get a moment to myself which I find hard.  I am a person that needs some alone time.  I am  not getting that right now, and it makes me cranky.  I know it is temporary and I repeat that in my head every day.  Since I am pumping instead of breastfeeding, I have to wake up even if the baby is still sleep which is adding to my sleep deprivation.  Right now she has been sleeping since midnight, but I am awake pumping.  I am hoping that I can grab a little more sleep before she wakes up to eat.

Despite the sleep deprivation and having a permanent shadow, I love my girls.  I am working on finding ways to spend some alone time with Hannah so she doesn't feel ignored.  My goal for the next few weeks is to have a few mommy/daughter dates.  I think she will like that, and hopefully it will cut down on her attitude.  Of course, she is two so the attitude may stick around for another year.

The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

It has been a crazy few weeks around here adjusting to a newborn in the house.  I am sleep deprived, but doing pretty well.  Meeghan is a pretty good baby so I can't complain too much.

Now for the highlights of the past week:

The Good:  We found out that another guy that was in the same situation as the husband was approved to switch pipelines.  That gives us hope that he will be approved as well.  He has been transferred to the Wing which is the first step to approval.  We also found out that the guy was given PCS orders which is such a huge relief.  We have been trying to decide what to do about the living situation.  The base is less than 50 miles so we weren't sure if they would consider it a PCS move.  We were trying to decide between paying out of pocket to move, using the tax refund to buy a second car so the husband can commute, or having him geo-bach.  If they pay to move us, that is such a weight off our shoulders.

The Bad: It took 4 months for this guy to hear something which means we still have possibly have another 3 months of waiting around to hear the verdict.  That is a long time to hang in limbo especially when you are ready to move on with training.

The Ugly: Last week Hannah developed hand, foot and mouth disease.  I was so freaked out since Meeghan was only 7 days old at the time.  Luckily, we were able to keep Hannah away from her so she didn't get it.  Hannah is finally feeling better, but I am not sure when to allow her to play with other kids.  I don't want to kids to get sick right at Christmas.  However, Hannah needs to play because she is tired of being cooped up.  She is definitely needing to get out and play.  She woke up at midnight last night and didn't fall back asleep until 6:30.  I can't wait until I can leave the house again!

Other than that, we are preparing for Christmas here in Texas.  It will be my first Christmas spent away from family.  Last year we made the drive, but I didn't want to do it this year.  Now I wish I had agreed to it because it doesn't feel the same.  At least this year we can start to make our own family traditions.

Introducing...

Meeghan:

She was born Thursday at 4:35pm weighing 8 pounds 2 ounces and 19.5 inches long.  It was definitely an exciting birth.  I arrived at the hospital at 5:45am for a scheduled induction.  They placed one dose of cytotec at 7:50.  I was closed at this point.  They check 4 hours later, and I am only 1 so they give me a second dose.  At this point, my back really starts to hurt and I feel like I need to walk a lot to get rid of the pain.  By 2, I am really feeling contractions.  I can't believe they hurt so bad and I am not that far along.  Plus they were really close together.  I was starting to feel some pressure, and so the nurse checked me around 3. I was only 3cm.  She said I could get the epidural if I wanted it, and I said yes.

Trying to breathe through the pain

After that it becomes pretty blurry.  Baby's heart rate began to drop so I had to lay in bed on my side while the contractions increased in strength.  I hate laboring in bed. I was gripping the side of the bed and doing my best to breathe.  At this point I was begging for anything to take the edge off the contractions.  Nurse checks me again and I am 6.  Baby was moving fast, and they were trying to help me.  Shortly after that they tried to get an epidural, but they couldn't sit me up due to the heart rate.  The doctor was failing at getting it in since I was lying on my side.  At this point, I needed to push. I could feel her and I needed to get her out.  They said I was only 9, and to wait.  Finally, they sat me up and I received a spinal.  However, I was immediately rushed to the OR where they prepared for an emergency c-section because her heart rate dropped to 50.  My doctor decided to have me push a few times in the OR to see if I could get her out.  He did use forceps to help her along.  Luckily, it only took 6 pushes and she was out so no c-section was necessary.

I couldn't believe how crazy and chaotic it was.  It is such a blurry experience, but now I know what labor without pain meds feels like.  I always thought I could handle it, but it hurts like a bitch.  I am glad I had the spinal for the last 30 minutes.  It is pretty amusing though.  The doctor and the nurse told me at noon there was no way I was having a baby that day since I was only 1cm.  My husband wasn't even there yet. He didn't show up until 2pm.  I am so glad he decided to skip Hannah's nap and come up to the hospital otherwise he would have missed the whole thing.  Meeghan was stubborn, but when she was ready to make her appearance she did it in grand fashion.  She shocked the entire staff and me.  She is perfectly healthy.  Her face is a little bruised and scratched.  She came out with some long fingernails, but I guess that is what an extra week will do to you.  We were able to go home the next day which made me so happy.  I hate staying in the hospital.  Every one is doing great.  Hannah is having a few jealousy issues and is trying to adjust.  I know it will take some time for her to really understand what is going on.  The dogs aren't thrilled about having a screaming baby around the house, but they will adjust as well.

Hannah and Meeghan

Meeghan and I heading home

It is baby day!

I am off to the hospital in a few minutes.  I guess I am not surprised I am being induced, but I wish I had started labor on my own. I waited until 41 weeks, and I think I have waited long enough.  I am pretty nervous, excited, and anxious.  I guess knowing what I have waiting for me has me a bit scared, but in the end I know it is worth it.  Next time I post I will finally have news of a baby!

No baby

I am still waiting on this baby to make her appearance.  I have been walking, squatting, and on my feet all weekend.  Nothing!  I do have some contractions, but they aren't regular enough to really count.  I even tried nipple stimulation and sex.  This kid isn't budging!  Hannah was 4 days late and born on the 3rd of June.  Today I am 4 days late and it is the 3rd of December.  I was hoping she would come today so they would be exactly 2 1/2 years apart.  It doesn't look promising.  My guess is I will make it to Thursday and be induced. I really don't want to be induced, but I am running out of time and options.