Milestones

Today Hannah had her first day of preschool.  She said she loved it and wants to go back.  She didn't tell me much of what she did.  Her teachers were putting the full time kids down for a nap so I was unable to talk to them, but one did say Hannah had a great day.  I found dirt in her hair, and she confessed she threw wood chips on her head.  Sounds like Hannah.  She is ready to go back Friday.

She chose the Angry Birds lunch box

Getting ready to head inside

Also, this little cutie is 3 months old (as of last week, I am a bit late!)

She is trying to roll over.  I am not ready for her to be mobile, so she can wait a few more weeks. She does giggle, but only for Hannah.  I can get huge smiles out of her, but not really any giggles.  Hannah will get the biggest laughs out of her.  She already loves her big sister. It is pretty cute.  She recognizes her bottle, and gets pissed if you don't give it to her when she sees it.  It is crazy to think that in a few months she will be sitting up, and trying to figure out how to crawl.  

Crazy dog?

The last few days my dog Pepper has been acting odd.  She has been staring at the wall like there is something on it.  She will even jump on the wall like she is trying to get something.  She has done it in three different locations of the house.  Of course it always happens in the middle of the night.  She can't pull this crap during the day.  I have never found anything, but it makes me wonder what she sees or hears to be acting so nuts.  Last week I found a scorpion on the wall in my kitchen.  I have been freaked out since.  One night there was a huge rat on my patio.  After those two incidents, I am petrified about what could be lurking in my house driving Pepper crazy.  Rowdy doesn't seem to be too concerned about whatever it could be so I am hoping Pepper is just nutty.  I have to think that otherwise I would lie awake at night wondering what is crawling in the walls of my house.  Let's just say I am not all that thrilled with the insects and rodents of South Texas.

I am pretty sure I suck

With the husband back to work, I have been home alone all day.  Last time I was in this situation I only had one kid.  Now that I have two, I feel like a freaking basket case every day.  Between household chores, feeding Meeghan, pumping for Meeghan, and then my very difficult toddler I feel like the day is just nuts.  I have done a terrible job of balancing everything.  Some days I think it would be better for my sanity to find a job and put the kids in day care.  I am not sure I am meant to be a stay at home mom. It is at the point that some days I don't even want to be around Hannah.  I feel horrible for even writing that.  The days feel so long.  I am usually at my breaking point before lunch.  I wonder how other women do it and make it look so easy.  I know other women out there would give their left arm to be in my position which is why I feel like a spoiled brat for even talking about this.  I lost my patience so quickly that I end up saying things I don't mean.  Yesterday I tried to forget about all the housework I needed to do, and played with Hannah all morning. It made the day better, but by lunch she is in prime form.  Then I get a guilt trip when the husband is home because I am behind on laundry or haven't unpacked boxes.  It feels like I can't win no matter what I do. The lack of sleep due to pumping during the night isn't helping.  Meeghan sleeps through the night, but to keep my supply I am pumping every 3 hours even during the night.  I am at the point though where I want my life back and want to quit.  I am hoping I can hold out another 3 months to make my 6 month goal.

That leads me to my kids.  I can't believe that in 4 days my baby will be 3 months old. I have said it every month, but I can't believe how fast the time is going.  She is starting to talk to me and interact with us more.  She is even trying to play.  I am still waiting for those first baby giggles, but it seems like she is getting close.  Hannah is becoming difficult. I am not sure if it is the age or if this is her personality, but she is becoming defiant, stubborn, and bossy.  I know some is due to boredom. I am one person trying to be available to 5 people (if you include the husband and the dogs who are just as needy as the kids.  The dogs that is not the husband.)  Hannah has been asking to go to school so I have been researching preschools and mother's day out programs around here. I found one that seems promising.  I am going to check it out on Monday.  The biggest problem is money.  The budget is so tight already, but I will find a way to make it work because I think she needs it.  I just hope she is over that separation anxiety issue she had a few months ago. I have told her I can't stay with her at school and she said she understands. I know she wants to go so bad.  She stands at the window telling the school bus not to leave without her. That broke my heart so I will definitely find a way to get her into some sort of program.  I was going to do a little homeschooling session with her, but I think we would both benefit from a few hours apart during the week.  I am hoping between her time at school, and more sleep in my future, we will get back to the fun we used to have.

Lastly, I will leave you with a picture of the view of the bay from the guest room/office.  I had to steal it from the husband's phone since I haven't had a chance to take pictures yet.  I need to get one of the sunrise, but I usually try to sneak back to bed at that hour.

I'm back!

We have internet again which means I don't have to use the tether on my phone anymore.  I am glad we are mostly unpacked and seem to be settling in here.  The highlights of the past week are pretty short, but they are big ones.  The husband bought a car with some of our tax refund so we are no longer a one car family.  Now I am free to go places during the day.  We were stuck at home (although we are close to a playground so we did walk there), and that would make for very long days.  He bought a 1995 Chevy Silverado.  It has the extended cab so we can put the girls in it as well.  It isn't the nicest of cars, but it is in good condition and it should do the job while we are here.  There are some other things from this week, but they are negatives which can wait for another post.  For now, I am going to take advantage of sleep while I can before everyone wakes up for the day.

Moving stinks

We are moved in (for the most part).  We still have a few things at our old house, and we need to clean it.  Our lease doesn't end until the 28th so we have a few weeks.  I think today is going to be a cleaning day, but with kids we won't get much done.  There were only a few casualties in this move.  One was my favorite hot chocolate mug.  It was crushed in to many pieces so I couldn't even salvage it.  The other was our dining table.  It is a glass top.  The glass had a crack in it.  The husband didn't believe me until the glass shattered when he tried to find a spot for it on the truck. I am not too upset about this. I have wanted a new table for a while.  We only had two chairs so we were talking about finding a new table since we need more than two chairs. Plus a glass top is not ideal with dogs and kids.  The table always had some sort of smudge or mark on it. I got tired of crawling under the table to wipe it down.  Nose prints are hard to scrub!  I thought for sure I was going to be crushed by the washer.  The laundry room is on the second floor so we were stuck hauling it up the stairs.  I have no measurable upper body strength so it was pretty interesting.  There was a lot of cussing and yelling, but the washer and dryer made it safely to the second floor.

The dogs are so happy here. They have a yard.  That is all they wanted.  Rowdy finally got to soak up the sun in the grass again.  At our old place she would have to lie on our concrete patio which is not as comfortable as the grass.  Hannah is slowly adjusting to the new place.  She kept asking to go home Friday. I think she kind of understands that this is home now.  However, she keeps wetting the bed and her pants.  I am hoping that this is a reaction to moving and after she adjusts she will stop.

We have a view of the bay from our windows.  Meeghan and I watched the sun rise over the water yesterday morning.  It was beautiful.  I really need to find the camera so I can take a picture of it.  This move I am not as gung ho about unpacking since we are moving so soon.  The husband's wing date is in July.  It seems so silly to unpack when we have to turn around and pack it all again. I think living here will be good though.  It is our first experience with base housing.  I am curious to see what it will be like.

Chaos

The husband went back to work this week.  He had been home since November, so I became accustomed to him being here.  I got a wake up call Monday morning when everything fell on me.  I never even made it to the shower because the day was so hectic.  I know part of it is the fact we are in the middle of a move which makes it hard for Hannah to play.  She has been acting out a lot, and it is driving me crazy.  I blame the move.  Hopefully in a few weeks she will start to behave a little better.  It seems like as soon as I complete one task somebody wants something.  I have to feed myself, the dogs, the kids, walk the dogs, pump, feed kids again, pump, clean, pack, pump, feed kids again, etc.  I think you see the pattern here.  I would get Meeghan to sleep, and try to pack with Hannah.  I would get about 20 minutes before either Meeghan woke up or the dogs wanted to go out.  I know this will get better once we move and have a yard again.  I won't have to walk the dogs every few hours.  It doesn't help that Meeghan has become so cranky. I don't know if she has reflux, if she is starting teething already, or if there is something else going on.  I think she has thrush.  I have never dealt with thrush before so I am not sure what to do.  I keep telling myself once we move and are settled, life will be better.  Right now though it is a state of chaos.  I hate chaos.

Packing

Our hallway upstairs

The house is quickly becoming a disaster area filled with boxes and paper.  We decided to move ourselves to make it easier to only unpack the essentials in Corpus Christi. We will only be there for around 5 months before moving to the next location (hopefully Jacksonville, FL).  We decided if we move ourselves than we can pack the non-essential stuff together and label it so we aren't sorting through boxes.  Now we have everything we need for the next few months organized into the same boxes.  It is a pain to try to pack with a toddler and an infant.  I feel like I get about 20 minutes to pack a day.  Wednesday I was able to pack my closet and that's it.  Plus it seems like we can't pack a lot until the last minute.  We still need clothes, we still need some toys for Hannah, and all the stuff we use for Meeghan can't be packed until the last minute.  Thank goodness our lease doesn't end until the end of the month so we can come back to get stuff or clean the last few weekends of the month.