Race anxiety

My first marathon is in 5 days. 5! I am pretty nervous. My two long runs of 21 miles were absolutely horrible. Just terrible. I even cried during one of them because I hated it so much. I may have had a slight panic attack during one as well. I am worked up over this race. E is running Goofy this weekend. For those not familiar with races at Disney this means he will run the half marathon Saturday and then the full marathon Sunday. He is currently battling some IT band issues which means his training has suffered. In order to hopefully make it through the weekend, he has switched to a run/walk interval system to save his knee. He wants to run the marathon with me so I am now using the run/walk intervals with him. I did not train using them (well I walked when I was tired the last few miles of my long training runs, but nothing official.) We have started running these last training runs together using his intervals so I can adjust to them, and we can learn to run together. So far it is working. I can see how it will hopefully help me finish strong, and help him finish. I did have a time goal for this race (I know, I know first marathon the goal should be to finish and nothing else), but I know I probably won't reach it. I knew I probably wouldn't reach it if my long runs were any indication of how the race would go. However, we do think that we can make it for my C goal time, but we are going to go with the flow and not push it. We rarely get to run together , and we never get to run together during a race, so we are going to enjoy the experience the best we can. The competitive side of me cringes when I think about throwing my time goal out the window, but I know that it is probably for the best. 

We are turning the weekend into a mini-vacation. My dad and niece will be flying down Friday to join us in the fun. They will watch the girls while we run. The girls are running in the kids' races Saturday. Hannah is running the Mickey Mile while Meeghan is running the 100 meter race. Hannah even wanted running clothes like mine so I bought her a pink shirt and shorts.We are cramming a lot into 3 days, but I think we will have a lot of fun.